Arrested Adolescence

I spent this afternoon in the pool. It's a great way to while away your long hot summer of bar. I realize that most of you are already at work again and thus cannot spend long lazy afternoons in the pool. I am filled with sympathy for you and certainly do not snigger "HA HA" a la Nelson whenever I think about you toiling away in your over-air-conditioned office.

I figured out that you really have the most fun if you swim like a kid. No sedate laps, no big straw hat and oversized sunglasses and excessive concern about getting your hair wet. I left my hair down and dove under water. I did somersaults. I did handstands. I jumped up and down, under the water and back up again, over and over until I hardly knew where the water ended and the sky began.

The only thing that didn't quite work out was trying to pretend I was a mermaid, which is what I always used to do as a kid. I have been to law school and am now cold and dead inside. No more imagination for me. All I see are attractive nuisances and unusually dangerous conditions.

But maybe part of the problem is that I didn't have my props. See, when I was a kid we had these diving rings, and I used to put one around my legs so I had no choice but to flip them like a mermaid's tail.

Sometimes I'm really amazed that I'm alive today.