Slice of Flight

At airport just in time to catch flight, having rushed out of big family extravaganza for grandma's 97th birthday at restaurant before dessert was served (said dessert having being included in big family extravaganza, and hence already paid for).

Display says flight delayed 20 minutes. Outside, the sun is shining in a clear blue sky.

Departure time comes and goes. Display remains the same. No announcements.

Hours pass.

Announcement says delay because flight attendants are flying in from distant city. Current airport is nationwide hub for this airline. Three-quarters of airline's employees live in current city.

Flight attendants arrive. Board plane.

Plane pulls away from gate.

And sits. And sits. And sits. Announcement says we are 20th to take off.

Sky grows dark. Thunder rumbles.

Engines on plane suddenly cut off. Silence deafening.

Announcement says airport shut down. Big storm. No one flying out. "Too bad about this weather delay."

Great news. Movie to be shown. Such a treat. No movie scheduled for flight.

Need headphones. No headphones in seat. Flight attendants hand out extras. Run out on previous row. Flight attendant laughs and vigorously waves empty hands, so as to indicate the idiocy of individuals who inquire as to the whereabouts of additional headphones. Hands empty, no more headphones. Duh.

Movie starts. Problem with sound? Tell flight attendants.

Ding ding ding ding ding. Call lights up the aisle. Call lights down the aisle. Headphone connections don't work.

Ha ha.

Headphones turned in; can't listen anyway.

I get headphones. I watch movie. It is Shrek 3. It sucks.

Think am lucky to be alive today.